In My Dreams I Hold a Knife: TikTok made me buy it! The breakout dark academia thriller everyone's talking about

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Balance is not something I’m known for, actually. I could probably use some advice from my dear readers on how to reach it. I tend to become consumed by ideas or goals; I expect a lot from myself, and I’m very impatient about next steps, achievements. But I’ve made peace with this. I am an intense, ambitious woman. I studied myself the way I’d done my whole life, searching for what others saw when they looked at me….I could never tell which story was right - Exceptional Jessica, or Mediocre Jessica. My life was a narrative I couldn’t parse, full of conflicting evidence.” Beautiful writing, juicy secrets, complex female characters, and drumbeat suspense—what more could you want from a debut thriller? I'm Ashley Winstead's new biggest fan. If you liked Marisha Pessl's Neverworld Wake or Laurie Elizabeth Flynn's The Girls Are All So Nice Here, trust me—you will love this."

this story thrillingly captures those exact imperfections the untouchable people desperately try to hide. and us readers on the outside get to see just how destructive false pretences can really be. But not everyone is ready to move on. Not everyone left Duquette ten years ago, and not everyone can let Heather's murder go unsolved. Someone is determined to trap the real killer, to make the guilty pay. When the six friends are reunited, they will be forced to confront what happened that night—and the years' worth of secrets each of them would do anything to keep hidden. With her debut novel In My Dreams I Hold A Knife, Ashley Winstead has woven an intricate mystery full of twists and turns that will surprise most readers, and she has devised a clever and original method for her characters to reveal details from the past and put the pieces together to solve a ten year old crime. Describe the development of Mint’s anger. Was there ever a moment when someone could have intervened? How could he have channeled his anger in a healthier way? A college reunion at the prestigious Duquette University...home of the infamous East House Seven...a tight little knit group that ruled the halls, ten yearsI was invested in the story throughout even though I really didn't like any of the characters. They all had some twisted motivations and dark things they are hiding. At one point or another I suspected pretty much everyone, so the ultimate revelation definitely came as a surprise to me. In My Dreams I Hold a Knife is whatever you're looking for: a mystery, broken hearts, very deep secrets and unbearable truths. Main character Jessica Miller is one of the best portrayed flawed, insecure, trying to hard to become someone attract entire spotlight, scaring the hell of being called as nobody. She’s self centered, ambitious, broken, over achiever, competitive, a true self destructive person showing sociopath tendencies. When all your characters have secrets, how do you get to know them? Did you have their failures and alibis mapped out before you began writing, or did you figure out their roles as you went? Synopsis: Ten years after graduation, Jessica Miller has planned her triumphant return to elite Duquette University. She’s ready, down to the envious whispers that are sure to follow in her wake.

Now, five of them are returning to Duquette for their 10-year reunion. But as much as they’d like to put the past behind them and show off their current selves—no one more than Jessica, who felt she didn't ever get all she deserved—someone is determined to unmask the real killer from among the remaining friends and won’t stop until they do The mystery surrounding Heather’s death shapes the plot but the thoughtful prose created the essence of the book. I was invested in the writing just as much as discovering the guilty party, landing me squarely into the 'I can’t believe this is a debut' camp. I’m telling you this is great, unputdownable, entertaining read while you’re lying on your couch, filling your mouth with greasy pop corn and enjoying each chapter. One minor quibble I had were the names. For heaven's sake, there are millions of choices for names out there, why oh why name characters with nearly the same names? Caro, Coop, Courtney, and even a Charlie has a role. But in a group of eight people who hang out, to have three of them with such similar names is dumb. Take pity on us poor readers who need to keep characters straight in our heads! But no matter how much I tried to cling to the shining jewels of my accomplishments, it never took long before my shadow list surfaced. Everything I’d ever failed at, every second place, every rejection, mounting, mounting, mounting, until the suspicion became unbearable. (...) My life was a narrative I couldn’t parse, full of conflicting evidence.”Ah, people’s secrets are the best way to get to know them! That’s actually how I dove into each of my characters—I went right for the jugular. Jessica is very determined to prove herself the most successful member of the class during Homecoming. Why does she need to prove herself? How do you navigate the dangers of comparing yourself to others, especially people in your graduating class or distant social media friends?

Riley Sager, New York Times bestselling author of Home Before Dark “Beautiful writing, juicy secrets, complex female characters, and drumbeat suspense—what more could you want from a debut thriller? I'm Ashley Winstead's new biggest fan. If you liked Marisha Pessl's Neverworld Wake or Laurie Elizabeth Flynn's The Girls Are All So Nice Here, trust me—you will love this.” Shelf Awareness “A complex and deftly crafted psychological thriller of a mystery novel, "In My Dreams I Hold A Knife" showcases author Ashley Winstead's remarkably impressive narrative driven storytelling style. Original, compelling, cogent, "In My Dreams I Hold A Knife" is highly recommended.”What consequences would you expect for Dr. Garvey when his affairs came to light? How does tenure work against students in cases like Garvey’s? This dark campus tale is told in dual timelines and is taut as a bowstring. It really delves deep into how far one would go to achieve everything they have ever wanted. Ashley Winstead excellently shows the dark side of ambition, obsession and love. The characters were so well-developed, their heart’s desires and flaws were laid bare for all to see. What I’d be hoping was a twist was usually just a revelation that one of the friends cheated on another one with someone else in the group!” New York Journal of Books “[A] captivating debut...Winstead does an expert job keeping the reader guessing whodunit. Suspense fans will eagerly await her next.”

There are certainly some thrilling elements in the book, but this is more of a true mystery that the characters and the reader get to unravel at the same time, which is something we do not see enough of. With her ability to weave multiple, distinct characters into a thoroughly well-crafted mystery that is absolutely full of twists, turns, and surprises, Winstead is without a doubt an author to keep an eager eye on! The character development is so well done! The past fills us in on the present cast and we get a good feel for what has shaped them and who they really are. Sure they have changed in 10 years, who hasn't?! 🤷Yet who are they really? Deep down inside? Not the persona that they have displayed for all their fellow classmates, but they real person they are- when no one is looking. Her brother Eric is adamant to find the real perpetrator! So their reunion turns into murder investigation against them. One of them is killer! And sooner or later the all secrets they have been hiding are about to reveal to change entire dynamics of their relationship. Nothing as it seems. Booklist “[An] edge-of-your-seat academic thriller...Taut and atmospheric, with scenes from Jessica's childhood and college years interposed with the dramatic events of the present day, In My Dreams I Hold a Knife will keep readers guessing until the very last moment. Perfect for fans of dark academia, the well-drawn characters will remind many of their own college days. In My Dreams I Hold a Knife is a twisty, literary thriller not to be missed.” Coop is my favorite character represents Judd Nelson’s bad boy character John Bender from Breakfast Club. Drug dealer, coming from poverty, smart, snarky, charismatic, seeing the true face of Jess from the beginning and he is the only truly accepts her. In my opinion his sweet fiancée Caro was too much light weighted for his caged darkness.

Multibuys

I am going to say something bold: I’ve failed at almost everything I’ve attempted in my life. At the very least, I’ve failed to do things the way I expected. In fact, I started writing this book after being crushed by my failure to achieve something I really wanted. This book was born out of failure.