Someone at a Distance (Persephone Classics)

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And if someone is prone to feeling ashamed, then it’s extremely, extremely hard to get close to them. Let’s put it this way. When you’re the kind of woman who loves relationships and deep and meaningfuls… In other words, some people have lived for approval and safety for decades, and can’t cope with the thought that they should have done something different. She and Avery have been married many years — happy. They did community service together….and cared about the world and justice. And so, many of us have had less love, affection and attention as an infant and child than we deserved.

Someone at a Distance by Dorothy Whipple - Audiobook

I want you to know that, just because it is a positive thing to learn to weed out distant people, does not mean that you cannot still love them. Only with this self-esteem can we actually bother to keep close relationships, and intimate relationships where our intention is truly only to connect.

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Their lives are happy and comfortable, mostly because of Ellen who creates harmony through her hard work in the kitchen and garden to keep everything running smoothly. Avery, a handsome, successful publisher is content and feels all her good work is his due. A pretty French woman comes to England to be a companion for his elderly mother. Louise is at first disliked by them all with her superior and rude attitude, later Avery is flattered by Louise's attention and is angry with Ellen for not realizing that he is an attractive man and that she should not be so complacent.

Someone at a Distance by Dorothy Whipple | Goodreads

Avery and Ellen and their two children lead an idyllic life. It is to all eyes a charmed family. But everything changes when Old Mrs. North, Avery’s demanding mother, hires a French girl, Louise, as a companion and language coach. Louise is a fine piece of work, a girl smarting from an affair to a man in a higher social class in her hometown, who is hellbent on exacting her revenge–success. Once Louise sets her sights on Avery, things get complicated.

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Respect what seems ‘wrong’ or ‘immoral’ about them, give that part of them a place. And then show them why it’s a bad strategy for the long term. 8: They get super anxious around people and don’t know what to do about it.